Tuesday, December 7, 2010



Today I am going to write about the mask we put on every day. We are born with some sort of natural traits that get developed and molded in human cast forms that are later on called 'Personalities'.All our lives we are taught to put on a mask and role play or be something else to somebody else for the sake of healthy communication and social interactions.

We are constantly trying to prove to our other halves,our parents ,our children and even our friends that we are there to please them,make them happy and try our level best to set a certain role.In this process we loose our selves trying to find out who we really are and what we like,dislike and appreciate about ourselves. The ''self " that makes us happy.

It takes years of pleasing everyone around us to find out what we want out of our lives and if right or wrong no longer becomes a valid option. It is a path we  accept and part take so we can breathe for others and battle our inner conflicts of severe role playing that has always been for others rather than  yourself.

At the ripe age of 48 , I still role play for my parents ,friends and my relationships. Do I wear a mask at times ? Honestly,I do. There are less than a handful of people that accept me for who I am and appreciate my shortcomings  as well as my qualities.This is extremely hard to do with everyone in our lives because we all have certain expectations on how we must behave and interact.At this stage of my life ,I'm working on finding my true identity and removing several masks. Certain masks can never be removed.  Human nature dictates that we must have certain values and roles that must be played in order to keep ourselves and others sane.

But often enough while we do this multi mask role playing ,we lose total control of our heart and end up with anxiety,boredom and depression and can no longer breathe.This feeling can last years!

In order to feel 'FREE' ,we must remove some of those masks that we've grown accustomed to wearing, simply because it's what we were taught.    Often enough we question ourselves whether something is wrong with ourselves.The answer I feel is NO,unless you  have been diagnosed by a medical doctor.

We have just convinced our minds not to be able to breathe and  can actually feel our inner spirit crying for help.It is like being related to a gold fish in a bowl with no water ,gasping for air. We suffer internally and continue to breathe without feeling the life we so much seek.

To  feel a certain freedom from our complex environment  we must  accept ourselves first and discover who we really are.We must let our internal walls down, understand the baggage we carry and feel every moment that surrounds us . We must dance if we want to, play if we need to, talk, laugh and love if we have to.There should be no barriers between you and the World you relate to. There is no right or wrong in the way you are.You are what you are.Let go of all inhibitions,communicate with your heart,feel every second you live and breathe with clarity.

Let people that love you, see that you are an individual  and you have your own identity.Talk to your loved ones, cry, show your frustration , express your inner thoughts. Only then you will begin to see your life as a clear picture of the mechanism that makes you a child of the universe.

And there is no question in my mind when you let go and remove the mask from time to time ,you will feel a certain freedom .

That freedom is called ' BREATHING '



  1. I know that I have a mask (or two) but mostly my not breathing was from all of the layers of emotions, hurts, insecurities, fears, etc which outlined my being. They squeezed me so much that I couldn't breath, both figurative and physical. Even now in my enlightenment I find myself not breathing for periods at a time for which I have to remind myself...BREATHE!

    I like how you put out here what's going on in your art and in yourself. Brava Sanjay!

  2. pamela...you seem to be such a follower of my blogs which i must thank you.
    im glad in spite of the obstacles we all face in life we must and have to breathe to live.
    soar with your spirit and you will receive such peace of mind!

  3. You're a very interesting man Sanjay. I do have to say also, I have purchased two of your paintings so far and love them! Once I recover from my spending spree I'm sure there will be others! Hey, I'm nothing if not loyal. I am the Dog in Chinese astrology after all. Loyal, honest and a bit stubborn. LOL

    Thank you for sharing your talent! xoxo